Rise of the Planet of the Apes

PG-13 for gorilla stereotypes, mind-numbing pseudo-science, explicit James Franco


I’m as fond of human civilization as anybody, but I know a better thing when I see it.

And I have seen it: it’s a chimpanzee prison break. Also, it’s an orangutan throwing a manhole cover at a cop car. But most of all, it’s a gorilla leaping off of the Golden Gate Bridge and onto a helicopter.

The pinnacle of human society turns out to be a film about its own collapse. And so the best we can do now is what James Franco does in this movie: join a powerful biotech firm (ideally one operating under the “Safeguards be damned!” school of management), and start developing the technology to turn our planet’s dull feces-throwing apes into awesome spear-throwing ones.

1 thought on “Rise of the Planet of the Apes

  1. Pingback: Loved It: Monkey Melee on the Golden Gate Bridge | PG-13 for Ugly Cast

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