“Lockout”: Everything Is Better… In SPACE

PG-13 for the cryogenic freezing of the criminally insane – a strategy which cannot possibly go wrong

Release Date: April 13, 2012

Ah, space. It makes everything better.

 

Prisons are more secure. Prison breaks, more deadly. Buttons glow brighter. Lighting sets a better mood.

Women are prettier in space; their hair, blonder; their fathers, more powerful; the working-class men who rescue them, more cocksure.

In space, old cliches gain new life. “The president’s daughter is in mortal danger”? Boring. How about: “The president’s daughter is in mortal danger in a SPACE PRISON”?

“He’s the best there is, but he’s a loose cannon”? I’m sorry, sir, I believe you mean, “He’s a loose cannon ASTRONAUT SPY.”

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s